(meeting my dense, shadow body)
I was dealing with inner criticism, self-doubt, shame, lack, fear, guilt, inferiority, struggle, powerlessness all at the same time for 5 years.
They call it the dark night of the soul
I woke up and realized I was living a lie.
I was disconnected from my soul.
I was living according to other people’s ideals on what success looks like.
I thought if I played along their script, I’ll finally feel loved, fulfilled and enough.
But we both know that’s backward.
Every action I took felt contrived, forced and so disconnected from my inner being.
I wasn’t in love with life.
I was chasing life.
I was never enough.
I did things so that I could prove my worth.
I created stories in my mind that boosted my ego, so that I could feel a false sense of superiority (others had to be smaller than me for me to feel successful)
I lived in my mind to the point that I bought every negative thought and experienced it.
I became disconnected from life because I was constantly living in the past…reliving the worst things that had happened.
I hadn’t laughed, genuinely in 5 years.
I created and planted roots in my dense body.
My constant worry and focus on death, losing people & imagining people thinking the worst of me was a constant blow to my quality of life
Of course naturally this spiral led me to a point where I couldn’t even bring myself to work, eat, socialize, pay bills. I was depressed to the point of debilitation.
The voices in my head were so loud!
My constant thought was, “who is gonna see me”, “what will people think”
I was giving away my power away over and over again.
I gave away my energy to things that didn’t fuel my soul.
I was killing myself slowly.
This was my crash course in dense,shadow body.
The other side of humans is often tuck away in the spiritual community because “positivity only and life is always perfect“
The truth is, humans are created to experience both sides of the spectrum of life.
Light and dark.
To be happy and to be sad!
To be overjoyed and to be disappointed.
To be erhh and to be yasss!
Life is about experiencing all that.
Your mountain is your inbuilt success story. Do not run away from it.
You overcome it not for you only, but for those who depend on you to succeed.
Naturally by overcoming you will become wiser, more resilient and you will experience your innate power and ability to overcome.
No matter how tough it gets, this is just a room you’re passing by…gathering your information and training for your journey ahead.
It’s all about how you look at things and how you interact with your past and present reality.
Always remember, no matter how bad it looks…it is just a room.
If it feels like you’re forcing to the point of burn out and disconnecting from yourself…it is the wrong path.
Crying is healthy.
Failures are healthy.
Starting all over again is healthy.
Being honest with yourself and still choosing to love & accept yourself despite where you are (vs. the internet peeps are) is healthy.
Also, No comparison allowed, that’s disrespect to your inner child. Choose to create boundaries around what you say and think about yourself, it will save you so much energy.
Choose to love you despite where you are and you will always be ok.
Your ego will try to shame you, humiliate you, make you feel inferior, feel bad and seduce you back to the spiral but you have to be sick and tired of being sick tired.
You have to say NO! I’m done with this!!!
Are you currently in a dense, dark body right now?
Let’s work together
I don’t bite!
Private Message me “Soul Babe”
Click the button below to slay your dragon
Better yet, if you’re ready to reconnect with your soul, I suggest you tap into the portal that is calling you in.
Mental Alchemy Coursework
If you’re having a hard time connecting to your truth, the odds are you’re not being honest with yourself, your past. You’re suffering because you are living a lie.
You want help transcending this? Click button below
See you on the other side soul babe!